Well, it's been a while since we here at The Most Important Blog... Ever have had the distinct displeasure of bestowing the ignoble Wal-Mart Douchebag Award, but the shenanigans displayed by this member of the US Congress force us to recognize this douchebag as one of the select few.
The Wal-Mart Douchebag Award is named after it's first and most evil recipient, the globalizing evil behemoth that is Wal-Mart. The Award is given to truly douchey individuals or groups who deserve to be fired and drummed out of public life because of their remarkably douche-like behavior. After the presentation of the dishonor, the recipient is forever addressed as Sir (or Madam) Douchebag.
Previous losers who have been given the infamous award include Sir Douchebag Armstrong Williams, for taking federal bribes in the writing of his syndicated opinion column without telling anyone; Sir Douchebag Ken Blackwell, the Secretary of State in that rotting state of Ohio, who did everything in his power to suppress the turnout of minority, Democrat voters; and a special Nemesis Edition of the award was given to my longtime best friend Ian for his hypocritical acceptance of a fellowship from none other than the Wal-Mart Corporation.
And it gives me no pleasure whatsoever to give the Wal-Mart Douchebag Award to its first white male recipient, Senator John Cornyn, for his speech in defense of people who shoot and kill judges and their families (via DailyKos). What a complete douche. This guy just insisted on defending murderers of public servants! Why? As part of the GOP's ill-conceived campaign to topple the judicial branch of the government. Apparently, this douchebag thinks it is justified for people frustrated with the court system to just go ahead and start shooting.
And for that, Sir Douchebag Cornyn, you have become the latest to experience the butt-puckering horror of becoming My Personal Antihero, and you are now the current holder of the Wal-Mart Douchebag Award.
The Wal-Mart Douchebag Award is named after it's first and most evil recipient, the globalizing evil behemoth that is Wal-Mart. The Award is given to truly douchey individuals or groups who deserve to be fired and drummed out of public life because of their remarkably douche-like behavior. After the presentation of the dishonor, the recipient is forever addressed as Sir (or Madam) Douchebag.
Previous losers who have been given the infamous award include Sir Douchebag Armstrong Williams, for taking federal bribes in the writing of his syndicated opinion column without telling anyone; Sir Douchebag Ken Blackwell, the Secretary of State in that rotting state of Ohio, who did everything in his power to suppress the turnout of minority, Democrat voters; and a special Nemesis Edition of the award was given to my longtime best friend Ian for his hypocritical acceptance of a fellowship from none other than the Wal-Mart Corporation.
And it gives me no pleasure whatsoever to give the Wal-Mart Douchebag Award to its first white male recipient, Senator John Cornyn, for his speech in defense of people who shoot and kill judges and their families (via DailyKos). What a complete douche. This guy just insisted on defending murderers of public servants! Why? As part of the GOP's ill-conceived campaign to topple the judicial branch of the government. Apparently, this douchebag thinks it is justified for people frustrated with the court system to just go ahead and start shooting.
And for that, Sir Douchebag Cornyn, you have become the latest to experience the butt-puckering horror of becoming My Personal Antihero, and you are now the current holder of the Wal-Mart Douchebag Award.
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